Still the Same

today, when i looked out the window of my house i just realized how different everything is, new buildings can be seen where they weren't before and the trees have changed. i realized how much i have lived, how many hurdles i have jumped. i am not the naive little girl who used to sit by the window of my old house looking out onto the neighbors garden imagining ways of playing hide and seek in the bushes, neither do i have that much leisure time to spare. but, to me it still seems only yesterday i sat the O' Level exams, trying to remember everything i had learned, excited at the same time apprehensive. and now, today i am starting my AS exam, again enduring the long hours spent on studying the ridiculous content, so it seems just like a repetition of what i did before in O' Level. this brings me to this thought that no matter how much anything changes or transforms, basically it's just the same thing. However much you change from the outside, how much experience you get, or how mature you become, inside you are still the same person. i may not sit by the window daydreaming, but i still dream whenever i can.

Freedom

No matter how old we get or how much we fight for our rights, we still do not have complete freedom. We are bound by an invisible string holding us within. Other people control our lives influence our decisions,as a result not everything happens the way we want it to. We whine, shout and try to negotiate to make everything right. To get what we want. However most of the time the fights become unreasonable, we get tired of protesting and demonstrating in the end we just have to compromise and settle down to what we have, to fantasies of what could happen and what we could have. But it is also a dent in the ego to realize that we cannot have our own way in everything, and the fantasies become unbearable and the lust for what we do not have overcomes our resolve.....

Thank you

I am overwhelmed by the kind gesture you showed in thinking of me even for a moment.
It's such a rare thing and all I can tel you is thank you.
No one has ever surprised me like that.
Thank you a lot.
You just made me feel very special.
Thank you.....

Lies

The basic human thinking, reaction and action is the same throughout. No matter what we say, when it comes to the most fundamental part of our lives we are just the same, no one is different. Which is not what I assumed before, thus making it a huge surprise for me to see it happen. However at the core I just came to know that I never expected anything different. All the while listening to the haunting words uttered form your seductive lips, I knew that the time will come when you would give out your traits and bring out the lies making the strong bridge that is being built to crumble slightly. I just never realized the huge impact it would have on me or how much it mattered to me that everything should be perfect. But next time I will be prepared....

Change

Life was a constant monotonous routine until you came by. As a fresh breeze that touched me after being smothered for an entirety, you shined your rays upon me taking me to a new phase of life, showing me a new meaning to it. You became the reason for many things in my life, the motivation to succeed and let nothing despairing into my life. Sweeping away my melancholy you made me special and walked beside me and made me much stronger to endure anything that came across my path. You cared for me in a way no one has ever had and now I pine for you whenever you are far away. I adore the way you tolerate my stubbornness, short temper and my demanding life. Attuned to your hold I shiver in anticipation of your touch. You are my savior and what you can do to me is electrifying ....